"A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity,
it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path."
~ Agatha Christie

Alex, Cole and Braden - At 2 years, 2 months

Monday, June 2, 2008

Coming Home; One Year Later

Here's yet another "backwards" post... I will be posting some current ones in the next few days, I promise!

The kids were in the NICU for 19 days after birth, so they came home on May 9th, 2007. This year, on that day, both Mike and I remembered (almost too late) that this was a very important day for us! The day our training wheels came off... the day we were solely responsible for these little lives... the day it all hit us that it was time to step up.

We arrived home to see Mom and Dad Ertel patiently (and most endearingly) waiting for us in the driveway...waiting to document this monumental day - and perhaps more importantly, to be there for us. Emotionally as well as physically! They knew we were scared out of our minds...this was the first night we were alone in charge of all their needs, and it was going to be a tough ride. No more nurses to hand them to if something got dicey...if a monitor started to sound, if they looked like they were choking...Yikes! Sometimes I wonder how we were able to get through those days without having a breakdown of some kind.

We drove up, getting out of the car full of excitement and trepidation and Grandma and Papa took this picture for us; the first image of our new family at our own house:

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This year, at the last minute, we decided to have another one taken, to show just how much has changed. (This explains my lack of makeup or presentable clothing/hair, ugh!)

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It is amazing to see the difference in the kids in this first year - it's just awesome:

Alex
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Braden
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Cole
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All three
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What a difference a year makes! I vividly remember sitting on our front deck, quietly rocking in the swing, enjoying strawberry shortcake in the sublime glow of a warm spring sunset. A gentle and mild breeze caressing our nerves. We never imagined their first night home could ever feel this good! Relaxed, we were listening to Mom and Dad who were reassuring us that we would be okay that night, that if we needed any help to call, no matter what time it was. But we actually felt good; lulled into complacency by the unseasonably warm evening and the comforting sugar rush. We had put the kids down easily after their first feeding, all was quiet, all was calm, all felt right. For the first time since their birth, we felt confident we could do this on our own! We were home. But that is how shortcake and sunsets and cheerleaders can make you feel - warm and fuzzy...bolstering your confidence, however fleeting it may be.

Not surprisingly (well, maybe to us), that night was one of the most difficult nights we have ever endured...yet bottom was still nowhere to be felt...we had a way to go before we shared the worst of it! But it was an eye opener...and I will never forget that last relaxing, dessert sharing memory - the calm before the storm..."How bad could this be?"

;)

1 comment:

Stiney said...

What a difference a year makes! What a great post!

- Christine